Turkey day is finally here, along with that mid-afternoon paralysis
Half the family made it this year, and thank God, 'cause we're short chairs!
Apple, pumpkin, and mince-meat pies fill the air with cinnamon dust-devils
Nevermind the barking dogs and screaming, running and tattling kids,
Kooky and drunk, your favorite uncle swears you can light a fart!
Surely we've got BIGGER fish to fry today.....how's them 'taters doin'?
Goodness knows how amazing Granny's poultry gravy is gonna be
I just hope some jerk doesn't bring that Jello with raisins, carrots, and lettuce......YUCK!!!!
Vodka is easily hidden in the various holiday beverages,
I swear it's the ONLY way I can tolerate half of my family!
No one's really that bad, but a little goes a long way!
God bless every single, dysfunctional, and oblivious one of us!
Dinner comes and goes........the herd migrates to the TV for pig-skin dramas
All say their goodbyes and don coats and scarves
YIPPE!!! They're all gone!!!......oh crap!!!! WHO'S gonna help with the dishes????