Swallows

Swallows swoop weaving Summer into Vermilion skies whilst the warm breeze whispers a welcome to the coming night. The gentle rippling waves lap the tranquil beach sands as the birdsong heralds the end of a glorious Summer's day. A million untold stories played out on life's vast stage. Night falls softly, so seductively silently bringing new life to secret dreams, precious wishes, a brighter, more glorious promise for tomorrow tomorrow Summer

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Edlynn Nau

Date: 6/29/2016 1:44:00 AM

I love the beauty in both image and word. What a lovely little dance it is for those Swallows. It's not just the images it says it is, or draws it is, it's the feeling of flying it gives! A 7. I'd put this under the genre of SHAPE POETRY. This what your peers are trying to tell you. Even though it is a free verse poem, it is much harder to structure in this wonderful shape. It is my suggestion to change the genre and nothing else. Cheers,

Ian Jones
Date: 6/29/2016 2:37:00 AM

Thank you. I'll have a look for that. Glad you liked it. Hugz Ian

Tom Quigley

Date: 6/26/2016 9:16:00 AM

Excellent shaped poem, Ian! Very much enjoyed.

Ian Jones
Date: 6/27/2016 1:05:00 AM

Thank you very much. Glad you enjoyed it. I just thought I would try something a little different. Regards, Ian

Kim Merryman

Date: 6/14/2016 2:19:00 PM

Ian, this a beautiful write and I love how you were able to shape it into a swallow. Very creative! Love, Kim

Ian Jones
Date: 6/15/2016 1:07:00 AM

Thank you very much for your kind comment, I'm pleased you liked the format. I wasn't sure if people would find it a little over the top. Regards, Ian