Get Your Premium Membership

Strange But True

A person uses about 57 sheets of toilet paper a day! Holy crap! That sure is a lotta trees There are 58 million dogs living in the U.S. they say But NONE are cuter than our Annie, I believe Men are struck by lightning more times than women Our pointy heads act as a grounding device The original name for the butterfly was 'flutterby' Methinks flutterby was much nicer choice Smelling green apples can help you lose weight As long as your honker is working well They say smelling bananas can also lose weight But do it in private, people may think you're unwell Slugs have 4 noses, nosey little buggars are they A sneeze travels out at over 100 miles an hour Imagine the big mess when these dirty slugs let go Surely we'd need to take a shower The elephant is one of the few mammals that can't jump Imagine if the could, buildings would crumble The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache But he certainly has remained quite humble Lipstick contains fish scales, holy cacka and eeeewww Taphephobia is the fear of being buried alive! You probably haven't heard of these very strange facts You need to know them to help you survive It's true, the electric chair was invented by a dentist Now isn't that what we usually think Sitting there while the dentist inflicts much pain Wishing for death as I spit in his sink © Jack Ellison 2015

Copyright © | Year Posted 2015




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 8/16/2015 10:03:00 AM
Hmmmm... I wonder why they don't make algae into toilet paper? It would save a lot of trees... And the green color could come with a built in air freshener... But don't think they could tell anyone where it comes from... LOL... Just sayin'... And could make writting paper from it too... The light green color might be soothing to the eyes... It grows a lot faster than trees too. Trust me... just fertilize your yard and farmers fields... and it blooms like crazy!
Login to Reply
Ellison Avatar
Jack Ellison
Date: 8/16/2015 10:34:00 AM
Perhaps you could suggest it to Delsy's!!! LOL Love, Jack xxxx
Date: 8/16/2015 7:05:00 AM
I really didn't know most of these facts. :o A very humorous poem. :)
Login to Reply
Ellison Avatar
Jack Ellison
Date: 8/16/2015 7:15:00 AM
I notice you are new to the site... a hearty welcome, my friend!!! Love, Jack xxx

Book: Shattered Sighs