Sorrowful Joy

Lying here blissfully tormented next to you, Never imagined a love so eternal and true. Little hands, perfect fingers, and teeny-tiny toes, Given the greatest gift of all-a chance to see you grow. A Blessing in disguise, right before my eyes, of how precious life can be. Living proof, with one tooth, just able to stand on both feet. Solid inspiration arrived, as gentle as a picture trimmed in lace. Fortitied motivation came so contently in an unexpected face. Love means watching your children live their own choices, But I want to shelter you from all harm, failure and harsh voices. Daily, I date guilt for not providing you a father, All the while living in the haze of discarded bath water. Unlike the renew a bath may sound, I suppress a yearning to drown, Submerge the ground by consealing frowns whenever you're around. A forced surrender, accepting my hopes of rearing you are few. But if I can't raise my Shae, just encountering her will more than do. To My Beloved Daughter, Shaelynn-Mommy Will Always Be With You!