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Shadows of Me

It's been some time ago I sat alone Watching mountains swallow a setting sun Realizing my shadow had joined me there on the wall I visited my vision before night could fall Up, was how I was wearing my hair Empty arms reached for no one there Dark shadows hid the tears in my eyes Deep green and sleepy from a day filled with lies The image appeared startled as I arose Turning to observe the shape of my nose As my hand reached toward the last bits of day Shadow followed me all the way I force a smile believing God hears me now Joining in prayer, me and my shadow bow I wonder when comes end of day Will my shadow vision stay For I felt so, not so all alone When shadow joined me with setting sun Today is gone, tomorrow we'll see If my, where my, shadow finds me ©Donna Jones

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Sean L Sanders

Date: 7/28/2013 10:31:00 AM

This poem, seems complicated in it's twist which is one reason why I love it. The first stanza I thought Wow this is going to be good by the time it was over I wanted more. You are very good in explaining your poems poet. I'm so happy I read this poem. realizing my show had joined me there on the wall I visited my vision before night could fall, who can write like that, YOU POET!!!!!!!!! I'll be back for sure poet.

Donna Jones
Date: 7/28/2013 5:15:00 PM

Thank you very much Sean....

Hgarvey Daniel Esquire

Date: 5/3/2013 10:11:00 PM

Dear Donna, I feel the sadness and I LOVE the first Couplet as I live on a mountain that "swallow(s) a setting sun. I'm partial to green eyes, I'll wipe the tears away You guide me through the daily life of the Shadow. A POETIC Portrait of Art. Superb Quill. YOUR many Gracious Comments I LOVE YOU ALWAYS and FOREVER YOUR Loyal Liege...HG

Donna Jones
Date: 5/4/2013 5:52:00 AM

Thank you HG and enjoy your mountain!! Have a great weekend.......

Voahanitriniaina Rabary-Andriamanday

Date: 2/23/2013 2:17:00 AM

My favourite from yours, Donna! So deep and poignant; as for me, don"t mind about meters; in some cases, we just need the flow to come out and letting it run free, like free seas helps a lot to regain force and courage and a good equilibrium! A very sane survivor's instinct, indeed! Thanks for stopping by my "sunglasses questionku". Love, Hanitra

Donna Jones
Date: 2/23/2013 8:34:00 AM

I appreciate all the kind words and appreciate you stopping by...I look forward to visiting agin

Melanie Hillmer

Date: 2/9/2013 4:47:00 PM

I really enjoyed the read. Thank you for sharing. Beutifully crafted.

Donna Jones
Date: 2/9/2013 5:33:00 PM

Thank you so much and for reading my poem...blessings

Roy Jerden

Date: 2/2/2013 9:01:00 AM

Very powerful introspective poem, Donna. Consider breaking it into stanzas for easier reading. If you want to tweak it more, work on the meter to put some rhythm into the lines. Cheers, Roy

Donna Jones
Date: 2/2/2013 6:58:00 PM

Well OK I see I have much to learn. I'll post one of what I think and I do say think is a lyric kind of poem and see how far off base I am or maybe I'll just keep it simple and be me, and leave this complicated stuff to you pros I love reading it so much...thanks you are a great niceguy

Roy Jerden
Date: 2/2/2013 3:00:00 PM

You might need to do a little reading on meter, but to give you the general idea, try to see if you can sing your poem like a song. The typical meter is English is called iambic pentameter and sounds like dah-DAH dah-DAH dah-DAH dah-DAH dah-DAH. Use an online rhyming dictionary to find alternate words (synonyms) that fit into this rhythm if you want to use tight meter. It's a good place to start.

Donna Jones
Date: 2/2/2013 1:38:00 PM

I will work on breaking these up but I have no idea what you mean by meter? Help??? But thanks for liking it and I would love to know what you mean

Fisayo Aderounmu

Date: 2/1/2013 8:57:00 AM

Best described as bitter pill with sweet cure. good job.

Donna Jones
Date: 2/1/2013 9:02:00 AM

Yes too often..thanks

Jack Ellison

Date: 2/1/2013 8:04:00 AM

Hauntingly beautiful but sad! You described your moment of reflection so vividly, I felt your longing for the sun in your life. Poignant! Love, Jack xox

Donna Jones
Date: 2/1/2013 9:04:00 AM

Thanks Jack, it comes and goes like it does foe everyone. But I am blessed to be a half full kind of person. Thanks for stopping by once again

Connie Gildersleeve

Date: 2/1/2013 7:01:00 AM

Donna an impressive write about you and your shadow, at times it seems that's all we have. Great imagery conveying your thoughts penned. Warm Smiles, Connir

Donna Jones
Date: 2/1/2013 9:05:00 AM

Company enough considering the alternative sometimes. Thanks for the kind words

Harry Horsman

Date: 2/1/2013 4:18:00 AM

amazing imagery here Donna, you really takes us there...wonderful poetry...

Donna Jones
Date: 2/1/2013 9:10:00 AM

If I accomplished that I surpassed anything I thought I could ever do so thank you for your kind words....blessings Donna

Vicky Tsiluma

Date: 1/31/2013 11:54:00 PM

Hi Donna - profound write this. You've brought it out very well - it's touching where you speculae whether the shadow will be there tomorrow - it shows the frailty of mankind uncertainties in life. I also like your use of rhyme throughout the poem -very nice. I'm looking foward to read more of your poems. Vicky.

Donna Jones
Date: 2/1/2013 9:14:00 AM

Thank you Vicky, yes we must not take one breath for granted. I thank you for the compliments and I look forward to reading your wonderful powerful thoughts somehow put to paper also.

April Mitchell

Date: 1/31/2013 8:06:00 PM

Sad and yet so beautiful great job

Donna Jones
Date: 1/31/2013 8:12:00 PM

Thanks..life gives us all good and bad. I choose to remember and hold close the best. Thanks for stopping by.

Yanny Widjanarko

Date: 1/31/2013 7:03:00 PM

Really a great penned Dona, I really enjoyed to read it this morning :) - hug, yanny

Donna Jones
Date: 1/31/2013 8:14:00 PM

Kindness and hugs back... long life and keep smiling like you are in your picture

Annie Lander

Date: 1/31/2013 5:46:00 PM

I felt a little happiness, a little sadness but most of all ...i felt the poet pain great write, you pulled me in with this piece.. Annie

Joseph May

Date: 1/31/2013 5:38:00 PM

nice write Donna....enjoyed

Russell Sivey

Date: 1/31/2013 4:25:00 PM

This is a delightful and wondrous write my friend! I thoroughly enjoyed reading this tremendous poem this evening! What a spectacular piece, Great Work!!

Donna Jones
Date: 1/31/2013 4:34:00 PM

As always thank you for your kindness and support, I feel honored and at home to be part of the soup family