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Relatively Speaking

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I've got one less relative than Snow White alas, none of my six relations are a delight Let me tell you about my cousin Regina After childbirth, she's got a slack v'gina She’s had a set of twins in May this year Hubby’s impotence is her greatest fear Her hypochondriac hubby, his name is Bill says that he cannot work, claims he's too ill But he’s fit as a flea, and I know he's faking… he’s unable to work, but up for baby making! Next up is where their trouble begins with Boris and Donald their terrible twins They both rule the roost with a rod of iron Regina can’t cope as they’re always cryin’ My brother Steve now calls himself Fred He’s a total fruitcake who claims he’s dead I treat all our conversations with derision as out of the grave he’s frequently risen! My bone idle sister she’s called Laura-Annie folk can’t take their eyes off her huge fanny she parades round in tight leopard skin pants and the ground vibrates if she starts to dance Six Relatives Poetry Contest Sponsored by Caren Crutsinger 10/31/20

Copyright © | Year Posted 2020




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Date: 11/3/2020 9:06:00 AM
You know what Jan, thank GOD we have our friends, some relatives are more like enemies than friends. We had a huge fall out with two of them who were just plain nasty!Sometimes you need to speak about them, it releases pressure from within us. Can understand how you feel 100% of the way! Blessings and love, Jennifer.
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Jan Allison
Date: 11/3/2020 10:07:00 AM
Thankfully its just pure fiction ... well most of it and i'm not saying which lol:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 11/3/2020 3:36:00 AM
That's in interesting bunch, never a dull moment I bet.
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Jan Allison
Date: 11/3/2020 10:06:00 AM
pure fiction lol:-) just wanted a giggle:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 11/1/2020 10:39:00 AM
Oh no those leopard skin pants!
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Jan Allison
Date: 11/3/2020 10:05:00 AM
Thanks Kim:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 11/1/2020 9:07:00 AM
Good one, Jan, Caren will love it. Hugs Eve
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Jan Allison
Date: 11/3/2020 10:05:00 AM
Thanks Eve:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 11/1/2020 7:59:00 AM
Ha ha, on my Jan, that's quite the interesting family! hugs
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Jan Allison
Date: 11/3/2020 10:05:00 AM
pure fiction ... well most of it lol:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 10/31/2020 8:27:00 PM
Sounds like you've got an 'absolute' menagerie there, Warden!! lol. Thanks for the chuckles, Jan. :) gw
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Jan Allison
Date: 11/1/2020 12:49:00 AM
I would move and leave no forwarding address if it were true lol:-)hugs jan xx
Date: 10/31/2020 3:18:00 PM
- I should happily be a fly on the wall with your family ... entertained family, Jan :) -Caren will love them all ... good luck :) - (We're having a real storm ... I think no one is celebrating Halloween ) - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
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Jan Allison
Date: 11/1/2020 12:46:00 AM
Thankfully they are all fictional although a few lines are based on a family member:-( weather yesterday and today is terrible... no boats sailing there will be panic buying of loo rolls lol:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 10/31/2020 2:14:00 PM
you've nailed this one, jan and i think caren will love it! i sure do!
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Jan Allison
Date: 11/1/2020 12:45:00 AM
I hope she likes it it was such fun to write:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 10/31/2020 2:01:00 PM
You do have some peculiar relatives. ~~
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Jan Allison
Date: 11/1/2020 12:44:00 AM
ha ha ha - the only one who is near the mark is Annie -to be honest we have very few relations:-( hugs jan xx
Date: 10/31/2020 1:34:00 PM
Imagine all them rolling up at your house Christmas morning lol I'd be off to join the foreign legion. Hope the day went well, we had terrible rain this morning, tail end of storm Aiden. Tom
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Jan Allison
Date: 10/31/2020 1:59:00 PM
yeah where is the biggest increase in infection in the teenagers/ young adults/ unis:-( it beggars belief
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 10/31/2020 1:55:00 PM
We'll contact the site tomorrow to see where we stand, the vote for the latest restrictions is Wednesday and I think it will be passed, uni 's and schools to remain open, I don't get that.
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Jan Allison
Date: 10/31/2020 1:40:00 PM
Thanks Tom:-) weather been dire but we drove about 20 miles this morning to meet an ex colleague of hubbies, had lovely tea and cake in a cafe, came back to bright sunshine at home. Can you get away of is Boris's ban going to put an end to your plans.
Date: 10/31/2020 1:07:00 PM
You have written the winner! Well thought-out and scribed, Jan! (but I presume you referred to an American fanny?) Aloha! Rico
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Jan Allison
Date: 10/31/2020 1:08:00 PM
shhh about her fanny Rico lol lol, i hope Caren likes the poem:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 10/31/2020 1:07:00 PM
Lol! Jan, This is hilarious. That is one peculiar and interesting family. I enjoyed this humorous write. Best wishes in the contest:-) Alexis
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Jan Allison
Date: 10/31/2020 1:09:00 PM
Thanks Alexis, believe me it was SUCH fun to write lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Book: Shattered Sighs