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Red Becomes You

Red becomes you but it is you and your dance I remember not the dress though I could not take my eyes from either. As I watched you dance with wild abandon lost within your zone I knew without knowing I'd been looking to find a woman who could free herself to passion and there you were. This place is not of me I felt strange before you entered and even stranger now. I was not aware that one of my mates had the waitress bring you a drink. At his urging I walked over to overcome my shyness and say hello. Now I am standing the drink dripping down my chest watching as your fine ass recedes and your red dress disappears. Knowing we will each spend the night alone. But will remember what might have been. DR MCMXCIV This poem was an echo to a poem "Red Dress" posted by Jamie in another forum, long ago. Her poem follows RED DRESS by Jaimie Sitting at the bar I watch you watching me Yeah. I know I look good in this red dress. The way it hugs my body, kisses my . .. curves The way you'd like to. I see your eyes when I walk across the room. Yeah I know I look good in this red dress. You sweating yourself trying to get next to this nose wide open, you and your boys. Sending me a drink, you come over as if that was something that gave you a right like you'd made a payment on something starting to get knotted up at the thought as your boys watch, taking bets Yeah I know I look GOOD in this red dress. Yeah! And you know, you can escort that drink right back over there with your friends. Nothing has been bought here. Nothing is for sale. And I sure as hell Don't want to be your ***** for the night. You CAN'T get next to this. Yeah I KNOW I look good in this red dress. Now that the evening is over and I've drank and danced gotten all sweaty and a little wet and had MYSELF a real . . . good . . .time I'm taking my FINE ass and ALL this, right out that door alone. Yeah I know I look FINE in this red dress. You know it too and you know what? You'll remember.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2014




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Date: 7/15/2014 11:03:00 AM
Congratulations. Sorry it took me so long. I just realized where the winner's list was. I'm new - sorry for not stopping by sooner.
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/18/2014 8:53:00 PM
Thanks Regina and welcome to the Soup.
Date: 7/13/2014 4:51:00 PM
Both wonderful poems. Grats on your top win! awesome and awesome :)
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/18/2014 8:52:00 PM
Thanks Casarah. A different time and place and I never never Knew who Jamie was.
Date: 7/13/2014 11:32:00 AM
Congratulations on a very great well-deserved win! I wish I could get it all together so perfectly!
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/18/2014 8:50:00 PM
Thanks Pandita
Date: 7/13/2014 10:52:00 AM
Aberfoyle, congrats for the top win. Mohan
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/18/2014 8:45:00 PM
Thanks Mohan
Date: 7/13/2014 7:48:00 AM
Congrats on top win, Dave!.. Hugs.. Arlene
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/18/2014 8:43:00 PM
Thanks Arlene
Date: 7/13/2014 5:01:00 AM
Beautiful n amazingly romantic aberfoyle! Congrats on top win!
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/18/2014 8:39:00 PM
Thanks Dr. Sharma
Date: 7/12/2014 3:12:00 PM
A bombshell dropped and you loved it... Beautifully written Aberfoyle. Congratulations on your first place win... Verlena
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/18/2014 1:14:00 PM
Thanks Verna Cheers Dave
Date: 7/12/2014 2:16:00 PM
Oh man this poem SCREAMED winner at first glance!! I was hooked which was exactly what I was looking for. So much in fact this echo inspired my latest Acrostic, Her Blue Dress! Excellent poetry my friend, it is good to see you on top!! Keep it up!! :JP)Asavvy1
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/18/2014 1:00:00 PM
Jared, Thanks for you kind comments and your contest. I just returned from a week long backcountry canoe trip (not even cell coverage) and news of this win is greatly appreciated. I'll visit Her Blue Dress soon. The 'echo' concept is fun and might be worth a contest in its own right. Cheers Dave
Date: 7/6/2014 9:42:00 AM
this is really interesting how you matched up with the original poem. A very unique choice of poem and I love how you echoed it. (hope you will try a tanka)
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/6/2014 9:52:00 AM
Thanks Andrea, it was a while back and the only time, I've tired an echo, but it was fun and I am fond of wordplay. In yet another forum, I've played in a haiku string where the last line in the previous haiku is the first line of the next. I an definitely thinking I'll try tanka too, the combination of discipline and imagination within these forms is most intriguing.
Date: 7/1/2014 9:38:00 AM
Dave, your poem is charming with a hint of sexy, well done ~~
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/1/2014 10:00:00 AM
Thanks BW
Date: 7/1/2014 9:35:00 AM
Soup mail!!
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D.W. Rodgers
Date: 7/1/2014 9:50:00 AM
Sorry Soup mail was off, should be back on now.

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