Reborn

Pain once made my brain lame, but like a song says "im trading my shame" In return I recieve Gods Kingdom and reign. When feeling faint, I make an attempt at Holiness. It seems that only you can take away this lonliness. Focus my mind, change my heart. I no longer have to play a part. No mask on the outside, No emptiness inside. Ive got some things to decide but theres no need to hide! I once knew a place so dark and deep. I stayed up for weeks under a bridge i could not leave. Its an evil you cannot see. Now its joy that I seek. Im changing gradually. Progress is slow but its a miracle that its happening. Its a miracle that Im laughing! At one time I couldnt smile. A secret double life that was built on denial. Now when I face trial, my eyes will look like gold! For the simple fact that im finally coming home! There was a blue sky outside but there was tears in my eyes, when my good friend overdosed. At 16 he died. From then I got worse. I would use anything, even if it was dirt. Guity conscience? How about no conscience!! My mind was gone, I had lost it!! As far as emotions go, I know nothing about them. I'll be damned if im not learning though. And self control. I need to man up and handle it so I continue to grow. Once my story is told I pray you see hope! There is no future in alcohol and dope! To the bottom of a bottle, it goes quite quick. Its pretty disgusting how I make myself sick. But things are starting to click. Im not running out on this even when I start to trip! Life is worth it! With the right attitude I see things perfect. We deserve it! A life full of love. Ive found peace that is sent from above. I once was caught in the depths of isolation. I still struggle with the same situation. Life is no mystery! Its crystal clear to me! I abandoned the fear in me and now I am free! Anxiety is like a spirit that haunts me in my dreams. I cried out to my God and he heard my pleas. Honesty is honestly the hardest thing to do. I put it in perspective, now I live by it dude! Complacency has eaten me and beaten me. The streets know my name by memory. Concrete is unforgiving. I am a member of the living but society had a fear of me. I follow good examples like the men with experience. They show me that theyre doing it but also that theyre living it!!!!