Perfect Disaster

I'm sorry I'm sorry My audience My audience of one my audience of ten my audience of who is grateful enough to listen I know you've heard enough of me today but I just need a distraction I just need an outlet I just need to vent I just need to getaway... I just need... I apologize to you Trapt for I have use your line again 'Well what do I want, I have nothing to say' Why does it have to be about what I want anyway What I want doesn't matter it just doesn't matter to me The words spilled over sloppily, pathetically and honestly I could have put it together better but you know me my mind is scrambled mine field of scattered thoughts, memories box assorted, decorated souvenirs I'm sorry If I wanted to point the blame at anything it would be Wednesday If I wanted to point the blame at anything it would be towards Ariel for provoking provoking the hatred to come out but I want to point the blame at anything so I'll just say, so I'll admit maybe it was me the master avoider the master of disaster perfect disaster... My love of mine to constantly spill the name Ever After though I forgot the tie to it said 'I could be your perfect disaster' courtesy of Marianas Trench So what I love betrays me today So what I love I lose today somehow befitting I did say I wouldn't be surprised if I lost... and I lost... I don't have to be present to feel I don't have to look to know Nothing has to be said for my deepest fears are true I lost...and it may as well been all my fault In my alternate dimension did I suffer the same fate or am I still happy still caring still smiling In my alternate dimension did I lose Love Letter did I lose everything did the things I hold close today betray me or did I not pay any attention I don't know I'd rather not I'll just let myself get back to being intertwined in Love Letter while I sit here in present time Feeling This...