Patricks Tale

Saint Patrick died on March 17th. So we celebrate the day with green and drink. Patrick, was kidnapped to Ireland as a slave, a condition he never fully forgot or forgave. Patty (as he was known by his friends) was a sober, relentless, devout Christian. As a missionary, he gallivanted methodically, converting heathens and if he failed to convert you, you weren’t left breathin’. He could burn you at the steak for ignoring ‘reason’. To show Christ’s power, he ‘banished’ the snakes, It’s amazing, the difference a miracle can make. The year 461 pre-dated laptops and even the Internet, so, I think it’s time we finally forgive and even forget the sad, sordid history of Catholic conversion “therapy” because today we need a reason to drink until we’re green. . . Webster: Gallivant: “travel for pleasure.” My roommates and I went to Doublin, Ireland last summer. In casual conversation we asked how they celebrated Saint Patrick's day and their celebrations are like ours, more or less - a secular overindulgence. But on a deeper level, this holiday, they say, is dedicated to the patron saint of heathen genocide.