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Pardon Me As I Puke

Cindy Lu Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Pardon Me As I Puke which was written by poet Cindy Lu. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Pardon Me As I Puke

And so the story goes:
Ex- Smokers are thee Worst!

You see them everywhere as they act offended and either:
Walk faster in disgust or
Stop and exasperatingly explain how they stopped, and you should too...
Excuse me, I was actually trying to enjoy my smoke..
Are usually my thoughts on the whole deal

But to take it one step further,
I invited an Ex- Smoker over to hang out with me:

Dominos Pizza, sure why not...
Extra garlic buttter, no problemo!

As he sat saturating each slice
and quite precise at not leaving a dry morsel

We watched T.V. and talked
and that was nice
He looked at me quite stirred of emotion
and said these words:
I would kiss you but it's the smoke, I can't handle it...

Oh, OK
(thinking to myself as I lit up)
Oh how I enjoy you that much more my little cigarette..
as I blew the smoke away
sitting on the patio
A bit courteous was I,
and if you've ever heard the saying,
I got screwed and didn't even get a kiss,
that much played out as the night went on and on and on.

They next morning he rolled over and smiled sweetly
but the breath coming out from his mouth as he spoke
was quite vile,
like a varment had crawled in his mouth in the middle of the night,
and Died!!
As I acted like I was sleepy, and rolled over away from the fragrance of rotten pepperoni, and fuming with slightly aged garlic....

The lesson in all of this is:
Take a self check when giving advice.
Look for signs that your opinion even slightly matters to the one you are voicing it to.
 and mostly...

Copyright © Cindy Lu

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  1. Date: 11/10/2013 3:47:00 PM
    Well said Lucinda, everyone has to do their own thing, right or wrong. Judgement changes with the the opinions of society, and most people are sheep...Well written...peter

  1. Date: 9/13/2013 10:35:00 AM
    I Found Myself Gagging A Tad Bit While Reading This Promotions Ad For Marlboro Or Camels Maybe Kools Perhaps, Dear Precious Lucinda Price ? That, Being A Smoker Myself I Might Add But Yes, Nothing Like A Bout With Bad Breath Be It Here Or Be It There ? Smile, And I Thought That Your Loving Heart Were Still A Virgin ? Hmmm, Maybe I Was Thinking Of Little Lucinda And `Thank You` For Your Lovely Visit; Stay Cool ~ Love, John

  1. Date: 9/13/2013 8:18:00 AM
    Hi, Cindy Lu. Most of my original poetry was written with a half gallon of wine next to my arm, a pack of cigarettes and some Hector Berli0z on the hi-fi.. I have no problems with smokers, give no advice. Good to hear from you. Enjoyed your complaint mucho. Love, daver

  1. Date: 9/13/2013 7:40:00 AM
    Quite a synopsis! I found this to be very entertaining... I wonder if a bottle of mouthwash would come in handy in these situations

  1. Date: 9/12/2013 9:41:00 PM
    I see you said down here that you were just goofing off with this one. Don't know how much of it was true, but it sure was an enjoyable read!! It's still everyone's right to smoke if they please. My only fear is that my daughter in law kept doing it during her pregnancy with our grandson and now is doing it while nursing him. Sure wish she could stop just for a while!!! (I don't nag her about it, but maybe I should?)

    Lu Avatar Cindy Lu
    Date: 9/16/2013 7:43:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Well, that's up to you dear. As for me although smoking isn't quite as glamorous as when I began, I really do enjoy a good cigarette. Thanks for your comment and remarks. Mucho appreciated Andrea.
  1. Date: 9/12/2013 8:28:00 PM
    People need to just get over it already... I'm still smoking! A little bit of smoke isn't gonna kill ya, just got to keep it under control that's all... Jeepers! Ha-ha... Nice write!

    Lu Avatar Cindy Lu
    Date: 9/16/2013 7:25:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    I hear you Danno.. I know. I appreciate your remarks here. Thanks much! Cindy
  1. Date: 9/12/2013 4:07:00 PM
    Hey the commenting on this really rocks poets/ poetesses, but seriously I was just goofing off... LOL... I was just a bit flustered in the writing area, and was like, man, I take my writing tooooo seriously. and LOOK AT THE REVIEW HERE>>> WOW! Thanks, you really shouldn't have. hahahaha I love you all so very much. Your friend in poetry, Cindy aka Lucinda

  1. Date: 9/12/2013 3:01:00 PM
    Hi Cindy, Quite an original write...Well done and thanks for visiting my work.. Ken

    Lu Avatar Cindy Lu
    Date: 9/12/2013 4:21:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Ken.. I've been gone a while so you were a new poet for me to read and I liked what I saw. I appreciate your remarks... I'm a pretty unique individual. Most of my work is serious poetry. I hope you visit other works of mine as well. Sincerely, your friend in poetry, Cindy
  1. Date: 9/12/2013 2:15:00 PM
    a very interesting piece Cindy......I thought I could never quit....thanks for stopping by...

    Lu Avatar Cindy Lu
    Date: 9/12/2013 4:19:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Joseph. ... :) soupmail sent ..
  1. Date: 9/12/2013 2:04:00 PM
    ha ha Miss seeing you around the soup and face book.... Thanks for thinking of me today... :-).... and about your poem,... I like staying away from smokers.. But, I have a problem my boyfriend smokes... and he does not like me around when he smokes. Gees! I think I'll stay away from what bothers me.. LOL, and not say nothing right... thanks for the exciting read... LOL...enjoyed the title... xox..Linda

    Lu Avatar Cindy Lu
    Date: 9/12/2013 4:18:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    I've missed you too... I'm under Lucinda Cayton (my maiden name) are we still friends on there? I'm not on facebook much. I'll check next time I sign in and send you a note ... Thanks for your comment girl. My life has been a lil' turbulent in past monthes and I'm getting 'er together nicely. TTYL HUN, Lucinda
  1. Date: 9/12/2013 1:30:00 PM
    Yes, bad food odors are disgusting as much as bad stale tobacco ...Great work about the topic...Enjoyed reading this afternoon..Thanks for the visit to my page..Your comments are uplifting..Sara

    Lu Avatar Cindy Lu
    Date: 9/12/2013 4:12:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    yup. Nicely put Sara. Thanks...
  1. Date: 9/12/2013 12:04:00 PM
    so funny, Cindy and so true. Ha Ha. If I am with a man who is a non smoker, I wont smoke in front of him. I have lots of experience at that. lol, the people I love do not smoke, just me. So... no big deal, and if I had wanted a kiss from him to begin with, I would have been chewing Dyntene Ice. LOL Drake is right...Febreeze is my friend. I do not like my home to smell like cigarette smoke. It's a personal thing. lol But you right.... even non smokers are smelly creatures!!! LOL

    Lu Avatar Cindy Lu
    Date: 9/12/2013 4:11:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    but then I would have had nice sweet breath, and his was a tragedy, for real... lol
  1. Date: 9/12/2013 11:06:00 AM
    - Cindy .... excuse me ..... but I love it!! - It is so true what you write here. - Anyone who smokes knows how dangerous it is ..... unhealthy .... some shit ... smell .... --- / / --- Old alkhol ... sweat smells .... bad breath .... garlic .. smell that better? - Enjoy your cigarette ..... (I do).... - oxox // Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 9/12/2013 11:02:00 AM
    As a non-smoker, I would never tell a smoker to put it out unless you're like intentionally blowing it in my face. But, even then, I'd walk away or tell them to move elsewhere. As for the "kiss" thing, if I'm hanging with a girl knowing she smokes, and I want to kiss her, I'd just whip out my can of Altoids or spray her w/Febreze and make it happen. =D Great message here!

    Lu Avatar Cindy Lu
    Date: 9/12/2013 3:18:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    mint please... mwah!! :)
  1. Date: 9/12/2013 10:58:00 AM
    LOL......sweet smelling air to you my dear. This was very original.....not like anything I have read on here before. bravo!

    Lu Avatar Cindy Lu
    Date: 9/12/2013 4:09:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks. Your remarks are my favorite on this.. I appreciate your uplifting words Wayne. :)