Not Today

i sit in my room counting the times ive cried over you wishing id saved all the tears so that i could drown you in them more tears escape my eyes it seemes my body is my own worst enemy because it is giving into what you want sick that it happened this way and now im walking on broken glass, not egg shells just to keep you happy keep you from snapping keep you alive its too much!!! cant you see that this is hurting me too i dont know what you want me to do why wont you tell me? ill sit in my room night after night wondering what to do wondering what you want me to do wondering why im so afraid of you why? because you've hurt me you cant ever take that back you cant ever make it right you say sorry time after time yet you never stay true to your word you just hurt me again and again why do i keep coming back? i cant answer that... i just cant... i love you... but i dont know if i want this anymore... nothing else to say goodbye? not today.....