My Life As a Teenager With Anxiety Part One

Well, like everyone else I wake up. Only I don’t want to because, well, because I know the challenges ahead for me. Or at least I think I do, and I always, Always! Blow those challenges way out of proportion. I just can’t help it. What if I burn myself cooking breakfast? What if my car crashes on the way to school? What if I have a pop quiz? What if I fail that quiz? What if? What if! It runs through my head twenty four seven and those questions, the voices just won’t shut up! So, after I wake up I lay in my bed, bound there for hours. Mind you I woke up two hours before I needed to because my mind didn't want me to be late. So I lay there staring at the ceiling thinking, maybe I should get up. Now…...Now! But of course I wait until I have thirty minutes to get ready to break from my prison of a bed room. Now it’s a rush to do my make up so I don’t look like crap, do my hair because every single strand MUST be straight. Pull on my sweater, pants, shoes, I don’t have time to eat I need to go, I’ll be late, and if I’m late I’ll drop out of school, and I won’t have a good life, I’ll be a hobo living on the streets, so skip breakfast, grab my bag and get out to the car, wait for mom to come drive me. Now I’m at school. The day is just getting started for most, but I've been awake for hours and no one notices how very tired I am and how much my body is telling me to give up and sleep. But I can’t I have to get these grades up. Always worrying about what grades I’m getting on this paper and that assignment. Walking as fast as I can to each class so I’m not late. At lunch I socialize but I don’t eat, I’m too busy worrying about home life, dad’s sick, mom’s stressed, the puppy, the animals, my room, I have to clean the house, but what if I can’t get it done.