Missing Moments

Decisions. Choices made in life. Why am I so blind to possibilities of the negative? As many times as life has disappointed, why does the pain always take my breath away? Loss. I should be used to it by now. But already I miss him - & I haven't left him yet. But I can feel the separation occurring - Desperation. The tearing at my heart, My spirit slowly dying, As I try to deal with my lonely tomorrow's. Seldom seeing him, trying to be accepting and satisfied with those few occasions. Lost. The crack in my heart growing as cavernous as the times I will lose, the moments I will miss, the memories that will never be mine.