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Memory of Your Betrayal

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Those lying eyes, yes I knew them so well I found out you’d had another affair Your deception made life a living hell On your jacket I’d found her long blonde hair I found out you’d had another affair Our wedding vows, they meant nothing to you On your jacket I’d found her long blonde hair No more chances, because this time we’re through Our wedding vows, they meant nothing to you I bid adieu to your cold cheating heart No more chances, because this time we’re through I’ve packed my bags, as I need a fresh start I bid adieu to your cold cheating heart Your deception made life a living hell I’ve packed my bags, as I need a fresh start Those lying eyes, yes I knew them so well FICTION WRITE for Dust off a Memory Contest Sponsored by Broken Wings Pantoum Form 10 syllables per line 10-20-17

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Eve Roper

Date: 10/30/2017 10:27:00 AM

Jan, congratulations on your win! Hugs Eve

Jan Allison
Date: 10/30/2017 1:18:00 PM

Thanks Eve-) hugs jan xx

Constance La France

Date: 10/30/2017 9:29:00 AM

Jan, congratulations on your win in my contest with this excellent fictional write, you do fiction well, dear heart !

Jan Allison
Date: 10/30/2017 1:18:00 PM

Thanks so much Constance i do adore the pantoum form:-) hugs jan xx

Joseph May

Date: 10/30/2017 7:44:00 AM

Congrats on your win Jan

Jan Allison
Date: 10/30/2017 1:18:00 PM

Thanks Joseph:-) hugs jan xx

Sandra Haight

Date: 10/29/2017 6:41:00 PM

Wonderfully written, Jan, and so emotionally charged. Congratulations on your win in the contest. Hugs, Sandra

Jan Allison
Date: 10/30/2017 1:18:00 PM

Thanks Sandra:-) hugs jan xx

Brian Davey

Date: 10/29/2017 12:18:00 PM

Great Pantoum Jan and congrats on your well deserved win

Jan Allison
Date: 10/29/2017 5:19:00 PM

Thanks Brian I think this is one of my favourite forms to write its a challenge but so rewarding when the poem is finished:-) hugs Jan xx

Alexis Y.

Date: 10/29/2017 9:28:00 AM

Hi Jan, I'm just coming back to say congratulations on your placement in the contest:-) Alexis

Jan Allison
Date: 10/29/2017 5:19:00 PM

Thanks so much Alexis:-) hugs Jan xx

John Gondolf

Date: 10/29/2017 9:09:00 AM

Congrats, Jan, well deserved!

Jan Allison
Date: 10/29/2017 5:18:00 PM

Thanks John I love writing this form:-) hugs jan xx

Alexis Y.

Date: 10/21/2017 12:51:00 PM

WoW! Jan, You've penned a well written piece. That many can relate to. You could feel an intense anger all through your poem. Betrayal is never okay, I would rather my mate tell me we we’re through than to get betrayed. It would hurt like hell but I would get over it. Excellent emotive write. I wish you the best of luck in the contest:-) Alexis

Jan Allison
Date: 10/21/2017 2:06:00 PM

Thanks Alexis, I am lucky its not something that has happened to em but i do have friends who have had unfaithful partners and can use that in my writing:-( hugs jan xx

Russell Sivey

Date: 10/21/2017 6:57:00 AM

This is a very powerful write, so full of passion and anger! I know that this is fiction, but it feels so real that I would have thought you've been through this before, just by the words of your poem! You have portrayed your piece quite excellently, and have written a remarkable poem, Great Work!!

Jan Allison
Date: 10/21/2017 9:36:00 AM

Thanks Russell I do enjoy this form and the impact of the repeated lines:-) hugs jan xx

Susan Ashley

Date: 10/20/2017 8:48:00 PM

A well-written, sadly emotional pantoum Jan. Your poem has a really wonderful flow and rhyme and the content is excellent. Many can relate to the heartbreak, sadness and anger of a betrayal like this. Good luck in the contest!

Jan Allison
Date: 10/21/2017 3:06:00 AM

I love the pantoum form Susan , I never know what my muse will come out with, I hope Constance likes the poem, its fiction for me but sadly others can relate to the betrayal of a partner:-( hugs jan xx

Sunlite Wanter

Date: 10/20/2017 5:28:00 PM

Oh, yes, there is betrayal in most of our memories. How brave you are to attack this form and make such a lovely story within it.

Jan Allison
Date: 10/20/2017 5:30:00 PM

Thankfully the poem is fiction for me Sunlite but I know there are people who can sadly relate to it:-( hugs jan x