Melanie

She killed me…she killed me… I’m drifting into darkness Melanie…Melanie…Melanie… Did she ever really know how sorry I am how I meant every word of my bleeding apology what I meant when I said things were never to go this way… Will she ever know…will she ever know… Melanie…I’m ever so sorry…could she really ever forgive me Wearing out another welcome along with the frayed fragments of my mind spiraling, spiraling from the wound which will never really heal Resembling a jagged tear instead of a small scar from a little cut A permanent memory, it brings the same pain when thought fills the emptiness of time She burned herself back into relevant memories she was banished from long ago I’ve felt the tears start to swell again, the dam’s about to burst The gun I’m under is only plastic But one more devastating error to me and I become shattered glass I’ve made my attempts before to overcome this I’ve lost all the battles, lost the war and everything with it Nothing I have planned has stopped my heart from feeling this My words are without sense, my notions high I guess it was saying goodbye which turned into the thorn becoming the illness Following the path to the vein connecting to my heartbeat Melanie…why commit this deed against me Melanie…I’m sorry I never attempted to raise my head high enough for you to look into my eyes The penalty was too great for me to handle Melanie…am I the reason, Melanie…please tell me Melanie…am I the reason for carving your fears on your arms My name regretfully included, I honestly shouldn’t have permitted it I should’ve never put you on a pedestal so high Maybe it’s the elevation dooming me from the start When I fell overboard the weightless structure we called our home Melanie…I’ve made myself into a wreck I’ve continuously tripped over my own heels to catch up Broke my neck to be everything you needed But my reward was a hollow goodbye Melanie…please here me…Melanie…listen to me I regret everything, I regret the words I never said and things I never did Melanie…whatever…WHATEVER! ! ! ! ....whatever You’re far too out of reach The memories can’t fade away; I just want to waste away But Melanie…my revelation for the day; She killed me… Stabbed me repeatedly, unconsciously, mistakenly But stubbornly I stood still; unaware, bloody, and weary Till I couldn't be much of anything but a distant thought A mosaic mess of a beautiful shade of red bruised black and blue And the beauty left my eyes as I was falling, falling into an abyss of lost consciousness As I was falling, the images were calling; yelling at me, telling me it just couldn't end here The memories just can’t be burned like photographs in a fireplace… Melanie! ...Melanie! ...dear sweet Melanie… She killed me…Melanie! ...Melanie… Did she ever really know how sorry I was, how I meant every word to my bleeding apology… Will she ever know…I can feel my voice slipping Is she right in front of me or has she already disappeared… Melanie…Melanie…Melanie! ! ! ! ! Melanie…Melanie…dear sweet Melanie….Melanie….