Home » Poems » Jack Ellison » Loud Gaseous Emissions

Loud Gaseous Emissions

As I ascend the stairs to my waiting boudoir I expel these loud gaseous emissions just like a car Is it the rarefied atmosphere More likely what I eat I fear Must lay off the beans, it smells like an abattoir © Jack Ellison 2015

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Michael Tor

Date: 10/4/2015 5:47:00 PM

Their was an old farmer named Bart. Who sadly had a bad heart. Dr. told him to eat beans, for a healthy new start. One day while sitting, he blew up his chickens, with an explosive loud fart! Jack not as good as yours my friend. I see John John is back lets get this party started!

Jack Ellison
Date: 10/5/2015 12:48:00 PM

You're not doing too bad for a beginner, there sonny! Keep it up!!! LOL

Judy Konos

Date: 10/4/2015 11:51:00 AM

Is this better Jack? BREAKING NEWS: Prime Minister Stephen Harper announced today that ISIS has been heard in Canada! He placed a phone call to President Obama who advised that it was Jack Ellison on his stairs...You're a HARD MAN .....2 please

Jack Ellison
Date: 10/4/2015 12:03:00 PM

Ahhh so much better!!! LOL Thought you were angry because my big barooners were threatening world peace!!! Love, Jackson xxx

Jan Allison

Date: 10/3/2015 5:55:00 PM

There he blowssssssssssss - ha ha ha love it jack - do drop by and see me some time:-) hugs jan xx

Jack Ellison
Date: 10/4/2015 8:16:00 AM

Sounds like Mae West from the 30s... "come up and see me sometime" but my voice wasn't sexy enough! LOL Love, Bro xxx

Carol Eastman

Date: 10/3/2015 11:21:00 AM

Use an air freshener my friend... And go up and down the stairs til it ends... If to this you don't attend... Your back end may be your only friend... Even Lady Cathie won't want to tuck you in... Dragon is agreeing with me here... Try Febreeze... It works on all the commercials with ease... Remember when everyone hollers geezesss... Just suddenly freeze... And spray that bottle like you did the cheese!... And all will be greatly pleased...

Jack Ellison
Date: 10/4/2015 8:14:00 AM

Hmmm! An air freshener... now why didn't I think of that!!! xxx

Tim Smith

Date: 10/3/2015 8:23:00 AM

Sound the sirens, he's gonna blow....he's sputtering and ready to let go...the smell is obscene...it's leaving a sheen...move on over for this is so long overdue

Jack Ellison
Date: 10/3/2015 9:29:00 AM

Never heard of farts leaving a sheen??? LOL