Life Begins At Forty

UUUUUHhhhhh!!!!! I woke up this morning to find I am bald, Wear glasses and only 5foot 7 tall. Me bodies out of shape and what is more, Me bits are all shrivelled, scaly and small. Who the hell says life begins at forty, I’m a blind, toothless bald headed shorty. Which woman is going to throw themselves at me, She will have to be blond and rely on a dog to see. I walk up the stairs and stop half way, Me hearts pumping mad saying “lets call it a day.” Me **** started making these terrible smelly sounds, And parts of me body are having a race, the first to touch the ground. I now need Viagra to turn me into a yup Or scaffolding under to prop me bits up Foreplay is leave me teeth in the glass The climax of me sex life is squeezing a pimple on me ass Oh youth where art thou, You left me in a mess. I look in the mirror and cuss with every breath, I’ve turned into an obese belch farting sow. And they say life begins at forty, with a body like this tell me how? ** It has been brought to my attention that I should not have used "blond" so if you are blond please change it in your mind to blind, thank you :-)