Into the Abyss My Heart Wanders

I have started to loathe everything about me. My heart seems pale and dull. My face seems to lose its colour, very soon all that will remain will be my bones and skull. My heart is wandering in the abyss, the void is deep and killing all the bliss. My thoughts are becoming dark and deep , I find myself on a cliff wondering maybe the solution to all my problems is a long last leap. I imagine myself walking through meadows, holding god's hand and telling him all my sorrows. This worthless feeling pricks and persists, "END YOURSELF" is what it insists. My failure seems my own fault, I will never be that person who is worth one's salt. My heart is full of regrets, the smoke of thoughts surrounding me is suffocating me like cigarettes. I am starting to lose the sense of love, the line between affection and affectation has started thinning, the god of death has started grinning. The abyss is dark and deep, the loneliness in here has started to creep. Every step I take here, forces me to weep. This world is nasty and cruel. A grave is dug everyday, take a wrong step and everybody here is ready with a shovel.