In Football Shape

Just like football I am penalized My wife says for being off sides I just wanna snuggle a little bit But you know them football brides She wears black and white pajamas to bed With that stupid whistle around her wrist She blows that thing whenever I snore And man do I get pissed I say,"What was that for, what did I do?" She said, "Delay of sleep for snoring too loud" She even plays a recording that she had made That sounds like a cheering crowd I even won a prize in a cereal box And did a little dance in jubilation Again she blows that stupid whistle Unsportsman like conduct, excessive celebration So I asked her one day, "What's this about, are you ever gonna stop this at all?" She said, "Honey I just can't help it, it's your shape, Cause you look like a giant football"