If Only

Class is in session My name is called for attendance All of a sudden I start to slightly cry I realize everyone's watching me Die inside Talking aloud my dearest friend says Why what is the matter? I say my mom is no longer here I need to be gone Can't finish my life without parents by my side What should I do? End it with a knife? Start over and tell a lie? I blame myself everyday Fifteen years of struggle Now as a sixteen year old Past-life is the monster I hide I leave it behind as I write I can't let life push me by If I let it push me along My life wouldn't last too long Maybe just maybe I can travel back in time Change all mistakes In a flash Return to a life I wish I had Without parents is depressing Knowing I'm loved in some sort of way Takes my life away If only I can travel back in time Just to want that happy life