If I Shopped For My Spouse Like I Shop For My Automobile

Shopping for a wife's no science So use your car for example Kick her ankles for compliance The way you kick tires for sample Pull her dress high to see the works Exactly like you'd hoist the hoods Up high is where you'll find the perks Down low is where they put the goods Walk around behind this chassis See how much baggage she will hold Check her walk and look for classy Watch for dimples to see how old Now to the face to check the paint How many coats have been applied Does it cover scratches that taint And has the hair been often dyed Once you're happy with the looking It's time to check the inner parts Ask her if she's used to cooking Or does she eat from little carts Then it's time for the money shot... Tell her you love her then stand back She'll either purr or she will not And you'll have your answer - or lack One final thought before you start You'll check the warranty, my friend Ask her if "Til death do us part" Causes her to grimace or grin September 13, 2016