If Adam Had Not Met Eve Hitler Should Have Met Freuid

If only Eve hadn’t met Adam And angry Hitler had met Freuid If Stanley never met Ollie And David Gilmore had never been in Pink Floyd Shakespeare had run out of ink and quill for a pen Mother Hubbard's cupboard was full There weren't any eggs or hens If Helen of Troy was so ugly she sunk a thousand ships Chuck Berry lost his cherry And Mick Jagger didn't have rubber lips You no longer went to bed with Pricilla and woke up with a gorilla Women didn't have plastic boobs clinging on to their chest So much war paint and poly filler Nero had no Rome No one had invented soap And singers had no microphone If Oppenheimer had a heart And they just dropped Sherbert bombs There were no love affairs that sadly fell apart If there were no flowers or bees No alphabet or language And the moon was not made of cheese Sir Walter Raleigh hadn’t brought tobacco to our shores And Jaws had no teeth Tarzan never wore clothes no more If Columbus never found America And there were no Indian wars Couples who can't stick together just bond with as many as you can If whisky came by a truckload When people talk jibberish you understand Polititions were foslsizrd dinosaures And Mohammed lived to take to the ring once more If jail was a heaven and the outside was hell Your house had no windows and doors And a storyteller had no more stories to tell If there weren’t any broken hearts only whole And freshly baked, bread had no smell Cottage cheese didn’t have a cottage no spoon or a bowl Money grew on trees taxman never was ever told People stay young forever and never grow old.