I, Zombie, Part Xii: the Remembering

It’s ten years later I’ve finally hit paydirt It’s the motherload I didn’t strike gold I struck a deal with myself To help me grow old Not act like a child But first I had to grow up And not act so wild I’m stone cold sober Bipolar under control Mind, body and soul Now I enjoy life Twenty five hours a day I’m still dyslexic The Monster is caged I’m no longer a Zombie The Daemon’s in chains Has been ten years gone Since in hospital again Doesn’t seem that long Now Doppelganger Monster and Daemon are gone No more Zombie, but Twenty years ago The Monster first showed his face Bipolar then showed I’ll never forget It’s a night to remember When we first met Me and the Monster You made my heart run faster Just anxiety… The Doppelganger And Daemon I’d met before Then started the war The Monster put me In and out of hospital Half a dozen times! Then a doctor asked “Have you had panic attacks?” I said, “Not before” He recommended Perhaps see a therapist To help me find out Went to the head shrink “You’ve bipolar disorder” He said with, “I think…” Found a social therapist Whose office was such a sight Dead plants left and right And on an old desk Papers scattered all over His files in a crate He said, “Come on in” He sat on an antique chair Then said, “Have a seat” Sat on an old couch I knew I would like this guy I thought as I sat “Hi, just call me Al” He said with a crooked smile “How can I help you?” Now, where do I start? How to explain the Monster And the Daemon too? But he understood Even though as I did not But he knew I would He would tell bad jokes And the laugh hysterically To ease my tension He explained to me That drinking booze kills the meds Enraged the Monster Of course, the Daemon Was such a happy camper With each drink took I asked him straight out Did he think I was insane? I thought myself mad I thought myself strange He said, “No!” without a doubt He was serious “You would never know” “If you’re mad as a Hatter” Said as we chat there Smiling at the thought “You would think yourself normal” “All else are wierdos” “You’ve a disorder” “Which we can put in order” “You’re just bipolar” Of course, my drinking Was not any normal thing Getting drunk some days The Daemon got me Became an alcoholic I’d think, It’s not me I was just running From my emotions and thoughts No place for hiding It’s never their fault Alcoholics do this thing Blame everyone else Just a consequence Of bad situations hence They drove me to it I doff my chapeau As I dance along the road To recovery I’m a Gemini With split personality Or so I did think Also, on the cusp Born on the two signs at once Of the sign Taurus Thing one and thing two The thing is… This is the thing I’m thing number three Me, myself and I Once me, my Monster and I He refused to die I’m still bipolar But at least I’m not drinking That’s something solar Still alive, you see Evidenced by poetry Which really helped me I was a wordsmith After all, everything else Wasn’t really me I’m the incumbent It seems I get redundant Frame of mind bent My mind gets quite skewed Lewd, rude and tattooed With words I’m imbued Just reminiscing You may think me babbling I’m mind traveling No dismembering Not just a December thing The remembering…