I Killed a Teenage Boy

(This poem is based on a true event that I read about.) I live in hell because of a teenage boy who I killed. He aimed a toy gun at me and I thought it was real. I thought he was going to kill me so I killed him first. Tears ran down my cheeks as they put him in the hearse. For many years I was a very good cop. I was great at enforcing the law but all of that stopped. I turned in my badge, I couldn't be a cop anymore. I can't forgive myself because of what I did before. It was my job to serve and protect but I failed. The boy's mother spit in my face and told me that she hopes I go to hell. They say that time heals all wounds but I don't agree. If I live to be a hundred, I'll still be in agony.