I Got Friggin Heebie Jeebies

I got friggin heebie jeebies Cuz buzzards circle o'er me eyeing these lovely bones prithee id est Roy L. T. Canard, Si hence impossible mission to be lovey dove vee. Vague remembrances of dream which recurred with frequency transfixed by Sir Real majesty shows me and the misssus evicted. Hum habitually hiccuping in tandem feeling woozy virtually celebrating monarchism with British Royal Family, and about eager and ready to take a snoozy so please pardon this poet exhibiting being a lil oozy, nevertheless yours truly birthed the following verse a reasonable rhyme and doozy considering yours truly tipsy and boozy. Now this raggedy man whilst deep in sleep this past night what felt like galactic body fell upon ma slumbering heap affecting immediate fear lest worst nightmare viz management boot us into emotional inferno felt steel tipped kickstarter, would crush with might but lo… heavy weighted body just zee spouse plunked herself into zzz land immediately within unconsciousness deep that's the husband unable to recaptcha pleasant dreams well nigh past midnight. Unable to shake away drunken stupor nor defeat insomnia reliving sinister tête-à-tête so...rather than emit shrieks like some angry bird idea arose to resume completing poem expressing discombobulated state, whereby sixty shades of grey matter feels similar to thick whey curds palliative sans restorative power per rest hopefully clear muddled pate plagued with grogginess and marauding herds of mailer daemons worse than unsuitable mate or a world wide web filled with nerds, thus lethargy purged via catharsis forming swords follow rhyming pattern to convey drowsy tipsy mood, a synonym for my words. Noah respite despite eliminating kinks courtesy arched back from cat nap as ginned tonic, nor lion here feline groovy getting high temporarily spells relief and serve as balm with pillowed temptress ever near beckons softly inviting calm before this human goes awry and berserk on manic tear being revisited from haunts inside head of this wordsmith caught by men in white coats coming to take me away Ho-ho, hee-hee, ha-ha, to the funny farm straitjacketing this maniac wrought with weariness dark ringed circles around eyes showing Adonis long since didst veer Judas Priest or if you prefer heavens to murgatroyd can't stomach bulge spills o'er tattered underwear, whose tushy by the way once upon a time about the size of average palm pilot, yet taut for witnessing three score plus three mortal year. This ole goat intoxicated, plus forcibly locked within fas paux blinding darkness, the pitch black common all purpose room in disarray after Skyping English fete at fictional Knock Less Apartments aye daily encounter, one bewitchingly hair raising dreaded locked rooted tension doth amplify fiendishly horrible, jeeringly loopy, nippy nap noopy, pugnaciously ravenous, talon viciously wizened, xenophobic yeti, zapping zeroing zillion zippers, zoned alley bye barred doors fate helplessly jury-rigged sealed with plaintive cry; no escape known to this man caught in a deadly voodoo clutch, thus doomed to die ugly cannibalistic, frightful, heathen rumors myopic eyes espy alarmed at feeling trapped akin to a wingless fly tapping reserves of scapegoat coping techniques ingenuity, which earned me moniker "fall guy," where accursed cruel fate destined exit from getting husked, issued jagged lance like mandibles "hi there unknown weekly reader,” I pray for super leftist write hand man/woman to extricate (via whipping up literary poetic fabrication), then joining me to sing jai (let victory prevail against killer odds) perhaps summoning division of British shiver rights phalanx, hood reply with Hackneyed "oh kai" springing surprise rescue, sans swooping inside mine hermetically faux invisible prison, where this troubadour doth reside, yet realistic to accept my demise without putting up a good fight well nigh against inevitable mortality (out maws of death) gleefully depriving grim reaper death his domain and eventual unavoidable claim, but if such kind unaccustomed soul can cushion the blow of penury... vis a vis philanthropic treatment manifested as deliverance courtesy anonymous altruistic benefactor plucking one bard off downward slippery precipice of homelessness, ye will be rewarded with apple pie ala mode enjoying a Quai, yet moment with Holden Caulfield doppelganger made famous qua Catcher in the Rye.