I Couldn'T Care Less Who Painted Them, They Suck

Strolling through some galleries in Hollywood last week, shopping for some artwork for the walls of my new pad, As I toured the shops I found - despite their countless choices - virtually every painting ran from 'yuck' to really bad! Carefully studying several works, trying to ascertain what on earth could justify the way that each was priced, I began comparing them - based upon their themes - from those depicting pastoral scenes to ones of Jesus Christ - Thinking I could form a theory...figure out the reason, some - while tough to look at - were a hundred thousand bucks, And some that looked like brain-dead drunks had simply - framed their palettes - soared to several million! I'm telling you...it sucks! Galleries that pull this crap are falsely setting values...duping trusting clientele by utilizing claims That paintings by Picasso and van Gogh are 'wise investments' when all you're actually buying are their - 'worth-inflated' names! And they'll continue peddling what portrays their lack of talent - works from 'long-dead-wanna-be-s' who simply - couldn't produce - What it is we connoisseurs of 'realism' seek - while I'd put what they're offering to a far more worthy use! Given I perceive them as but - wasted scraps of canvas...sold by frauds who disregard their honest critics shocks... Once I'd pulled them from their frames and - turned the artwork down - if my Persian didn't object...I'd line her litter box!