I Could

I could sit here and choose not to feel this sorrow. I could ignore it forget it and move on tomorrow. I could sit and bide my time til time is come and gone. I could look at you in Innocense like I never did anything wrong. I could move away far away and start again. I could run to the ends of the earth but would still be in this skin. I could battle and argue and fight until one of us was black and blue. Knots from anger's hand upon the skin of me or you. A temper can cause great pain. Emptying my mind while over crowding my brain. I could sit and allow it to sink in and sit and ponder. I could just quit fighting as I let myself slip under. Sinking into the deepest crevices and forget to breathe. I could do all of these things if I felt the need. I could spout Truth handing out my own judgements and proof. I could call out the trickery the deceptions the spoofs But why point out to the blind that they can't see. Why pass judgements when they keep judging me. I could sit and cry you a river with stories of days gone by. I look off into the distance breathing deep. As my breath releases, I sigh. Hate will come and discord is always handy. Their whispers will spill as their opinions are voiced. Sitting in tight wadded up panties. Some will take lies to heart and pass judgements as well. Others will be indifferent from the stories they tell. I know it will hurt no one likes emotional pain. But growth comes with taking responsibility so you must suffer to gain. It's so easy to shut it down, numb yourself cutting off what you feel. But I'm here to tell you that living without emotions makes life unreal. I do not choose to stop feeling like in the past. Where it only hurt for a moment then the moment passed. Instead these days I walk that road with sorrow by my side. A companion I know well and from one in which I do not hide. I use to be the forgiving one, the one that never held a grudge. If you looked closely back then you would of seen the smudge. The smudge beneath these eyes for I privately released the pain. Hiding the hurt trying to play their game. But my days now are empty and the years keep passing by. I've grown tired of smiling for I know it's just a lie. So listen closely to my words and hear them in your soul. The girl that lived within me before is someone I only use to know. For today I choose to sit instead of walk with sorrow and contemplate my role. For the game is life and how we live it and the truth will eventually unfold.