I Can'T

I can't forget so I toss and turn but I can't escape what's forever playing in my head. I can't let go so I do things and say things because I can't accept being told no. I can't think straight because my thoughts are twisted up in knots and since it's all your fault I don't sleep and stay up late. I can't move because every time I do, I keep going to the same old places and that's bad news since all those places I discovered with you, so what am I to do? I can't die because that's too easy for me and I need to live beyond my memory and walk - no run to reality - without you. I can't stop breathing, though each breathe hurts beyond the moment, but since I must breathe to live and live I must - I relive the best part of all this because I need to do this for me. I can't hold helplessly on so I must reclaim my dignity - not so you can say you helped me - but to prove once and for all that I am strong. No, I can't and I've said it before but believe this time it's fore sure. I know that's true - for a long time we've been through- but I refuse to go crazy so I must move on and be over you, but I can't.