I betrayed myself for nothing

I just wanna know how I became so low For never had I known that one so dear would make me lose my cheer I started yearning I started hoping anew I thought this creature would be my sunrise to dispel the dawn in my soul All my friends had my back that this creature was all things but now I'm screwed and depression rules Went against myself thought I had this Thought I'd gain something But I betrayed myself for nothing .