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I Am Not Whole

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I am not whole. Half of me is gone now and I don't know how to live without her. I grieve for all the happy times we shared. For all the morning cups of coffee she brewed, for all the meals she cooked, for all the times she scrubbed my back, for her kiss on my hand as I held hers in mine. Her light made my dim light so much brighter. Her beautiful smile made me smile inside. The spring scent of her body has me on a constant quest. It is the little things one recalls. I lack enthusiasm to get out of the house....to get out bed. I want her back!, echoes daily in my mind, and I find I can't go on without her. © Connie Marcum Wong *Dedicated to my cousin Melvin who became a widower. He passed on in February 2015 of natural causes at 85. He is with his beloved now.

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Archana Garg

Date: 5/19/2016 10:12:00 PM

A deep and very emotional write, Connie. I read the poem twice to get absorbed in it. A wonderful piece indeed. They are in God's paradise spending time happily. Thanks for visiting and appreciating my poem "My Garden Family" . Hugs ## Archana ##

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 5/20/2016 4:11:00 AM

Thank you Archana. When his first wife died after a long illness he met this lovely woman. They had only five years of blissful marriage together before he lost her too. It was so sad. His sons helped but he was never able to take up his art again after she passed. Blessings, Connie

Timothy Hicks

Date: 4/27/2016 10:30:00 PM

I'm not sure what it must feel like to outlive so many as you grow older. You become so apart of other people's day-to-day lives, and when that person goes ... it leaves you with an empty feeling. Touching and sad poem, but with your note at the end, a ray of hope.

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/28/2016 1:21:00 PM

I do feel happy knowing they have reunited in heaven Timothy. I am taking my daughter and granddaughter to see the movie Miracles from Heaven today because my g.daughter really wanted to see it. It will be her first visit to see a movie. She just turned four. Thank you for your insightful comment. ; )

Paul Callus

Date: 4/24/2016 7:16:00 AM

This is what we can expect when we get older. We get to a point where we rely so much on each other, and when one passes away, the other feels lost...often resulting in losing the will to live. You wrote a lovely and touching dedication to your cousin, Connie. There is consolation that they are united in a better place. ~ Warm regards // paul

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/26/2016 3:15:00 PM

I agree Paul. Thank you. Your visits always brighten my day! ; )

Sandra Haight

Date: 4/16/2016 4:04:00 PM

This brought tears to my eyes, Connie. You have captured so much emotion in your beautiful poem. I have seen this happen between older couples and it is so sad A 7, and going into my Faves...Hugs, Sandra

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/17/2016 3:45:00 AM

Thank you very much for your comment and especially the fave. I have a little part of my cousin in a beautiful hummingbird that I admired, and he suprised me one Christmas by sending it to me. He was the most talented wood carving artist I had ever seen. He carved bears, cougars, dear, a myriad of wild animals that looked so real. A great loss to our family. Thank you my friend. ; )

Daver Austin

Date: 4/16/2016 1:51:00 PM

I've never been all alone. Bev and I have been together for 66 years. Your tender words made me wonder what I would do without her. Love, daver

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/17/2016 3:51:00 AM

Appreciate her while you have her Daver, by showing and telling her so. We don't realise how important that is until it is too late. Thank you. ; ) love, Connie

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 4/14/2016 8:02:00 PM

connie, I hear they go very quickly after the one dies. WEll, probably those that were truly in love. VERY nice one you wrote.

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/17/2016 3:53:00 AM

It is hard to live without your other half. Thank you Andrea ; )

Nette Onclaud

Date: 4/14/2016 6:55:00 PM

love the deep, pensive feel of this piece, connie... so sad to lose a loved one, especially a lifetime partner... my deep condolences..huggs

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/17/2016 3:57:00 AM

Thank you very much Nette. He left behind three sons and two sisters. His only brother died a few years ago. I am sure she came to meet him. Her name was Marie..same as my mother's name. ; )

Manmath Dalei

Date: 4/14/2016 9:01:00 AM

It is really sad.U did a nice job here. I appreciate ur effort. .........loved always.MD.

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/17/2016 4:03:00 AM

Thank you very much Manmath.

Ravi Sathasivam

Date: 4/14/2016 8:05:00 AM

Vary sad but beautifully written . sorry to hear about your cousin.TFS

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/17/2016 4:00:00 AM

Thank you Ravi. He was a cattle farmer out in the middle of nowhere. No one would have suspeced he was a great artist.; )

Arthur Vaso

Date: 4/13/2016 11:21:00 PM

You had me worried for a second! Never the less I so felt the poem, you did a wonderful job on the emotions here!!! hugs!

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/17/2016 4:01:00 AM

Thank you very much Arthur. Simple, but heartfelt! ;)

Peter Lewis Holmes

Date: 4/13/2016 2:21:00 AM

Nice write indeed....Peter

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/13/2016 1:48:00 PM

Thank you Peter. I appreciate your visit. ; )

Vera Duggan

Date: 4/13/2016 1:26:00 AM

Oh dear me Connie this is one beautiful but sad poem, sad because Peter and I are getting very close now and how he will cope if I go first I really don't know as I wait on him hand and foot, but never mind we have our daughter living with us, she will have to take over, God Bless Melvin and his loved one, take care Connie......Vera

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/13/2016 1:47:00 PM

Thank you Vera. I almost lost my husband last year and I was a wreck so I know I will feel the same. Blessings, Connie ; )

Suzanne Delaney

Date: 4/12/2016 11:00:00 PM

How sad but true. To lose a lifetime love must leave you feeling incomplete. I know that is how I would feel and can barely dare to contemplate it. Hugs, SuZ

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/13/2016 1:45:00 PM

She was only with him for five happy years. He married her after his first wife passed away. She was the women who truly made him happy and her loss devastated him. Thank you SuZ. ; )

John Lawless

Date: 4/12/2016 10:23:00 PM

Connie, just the thought of having to go on without my honey is unthinkable. Well written and very sad poem.

Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 4/13/2016 1:24:00 PM

Thank you John. He was an award winning artist at wood carving. He gave me one piece I loved which was a humming bird. After his wife died he lost all motovation to create. His three sons were a comfort to him but he was heart broken. He lived on a farm in a tiny town in Kansas. My heart went out to him in the few years he lived after her death. I hope I can cope should I lose my mate.