I Am

What am I? I am a broken-hearted child. Too young to feel this way. Too young to want to kill myself, to die at my own hands. I am a tired and depressed teen. Rebelling against the world-but not in the usual way.Hiding my razor, drawing forbidden pictures in silver and red. I am a lost an confused young adult.My past clashes so much with my future that I don't know what to think.Is this my real life, or is it a fantasy dreamed up by a six-year-old me? What do I have? I have a bag bursting at the seams with betrayal. All the empty promises crouch in the darkness, waiting to pounce.Every "I love you" that's been said- it's all a horrible lie. I have a broken heart. It's been kicked around too much, tossed around and thrown out like a worn out rag doll.Nobody wants something that's this broken. I have my hideous scars.They cover my body, reminding me of my past, of my pain. They've become such a part of me that we could never part. What will I become? I will be just another broken-hearted dead girl.I can't survive this, but if I don't they'll see me as weak.I guess I have nothing to lose- they never liked me anyway. I will be forgotten. Nothing sets me apart from the next girl, so why would I be special? When I'm buried six feet under, no one will think to remember me. I will be a ghost. I will wander the earth, looking for just a shred of happiness that I could never find. I will haunt my loved ones. I am, I have, and I will be these things, but who cares? I'll be forgotten anyway.