How Strange Is That

I asked because I want to have... But now that I think I am getting what I wanted, I’m denying receiving it… Already scared to lose what is not yet mine… This… is really confusing… Did you hear that? I think my heart just beat three times in the skip of one… Whew! This is not fun… I see your eyes pierce my being Shyly, I’m denying your seeing, me I don’t see you… Well… Yes, I do… but I don’t want to… OK! Well, maybe I do… But… I’m scared to… Do you really see me? I’m scared to have what I’ve never had… Yet scared to lose what is not yet mine, which is you… I think..? Wanting to deny you just out of fear of loving you, to lose you… How strange is that? I’m not saying I fell in love or nothing… But I do think I walked into love… Yet, I don’t know where I am… I’m lost… and Well, I…I…I think I’m ok with that…