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Holding On, Or Throwing Away?

Judith Angell Meyer Avatar Judith Angell Meyer - LIFETIME Premium Member Judith Angell Meyer - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Holding On, Or Throwing Away? which was written by poet Judith Angell Meyer. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Holding On, Or Throwing Away?

There were things of mine in the drawers that could be thrown out,
But I kept gravitating to the things that were his.

His Public School 45 autograph book. It was red, white, and blue leatherette with 
a zipper.
Inside was his hand, writing the names of favorite teachers,
	And the dreams of the future you have when you are 13.
His father, an old world German who never shared himself,
	left ink blotches of emotion under his hand.

In another drawer, the fancy leather passport wallet complete with passport and 
	He was 16.
I don’t remember him talking about anything else with the same twinkle in his 
	As he did about the 6 months he spent in Germany.

Here is a poem written to him on his 40th birthday,
	by his best friend in the world.
The gift made so much better because it was so unlike this IBM Executive
	to write personal poetry full of memories.

There was an untouched underwear drawer.
Belt buckles.
Cards of love and joy that I had given to him over many years.
A collection of Christmas wallets.
A yo-yo. Gift from a child with nothing else to give.
Old prescription glasses. Why do we keep those? Pocket knives, hankies.

A sweater and socks I knitted for him,
	Always said they were too good to wear.
		I store them still.

Every drawer I opened, every cupboard, every box stored away throughout the 
whole house had something of his tucked away within.
A stray bullet or black powder ball. A toothpick holder.
A cork screw. A flint, patches, pictures of his ‘49 Olds, a comb, a watch, pocket 

~ Maybe if I go clean someplace safe like the fridge.
		And there was the bottle of Zeller Schwartz Katz wine 
bought for the coming Christmas season of entertaining.

This is foolishness,  hanging on.  
In spite of saving all this stuff
	the hole in me is still there. ...
		But I just could not throw him away.

Copyright © Judith Angell Meyer

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  1. Date: 4/15/2009 10:59:00 AM
    This is a heart-warming poem. The message is so wonderful. Congratulations on your poem being featured this week. Ernilando

  1. Date: 4/15/2009 10:43:00 AM
    Wonderful work Judith and congrats on your feature this week...Raul

  1. Date: 4/15/2009 9:42:00 AM
    A very moving and beautiful tribute. It is hard to part with such things, and does feel like you're throwing the person away. Congratulations on having this poem featured

  1. Date: 4/14/2009 1:46:00 PM
    This is so touching. The Lord has prepared a way for families to be together forever. It's part of His plan. I love to believe that. It helps me when I think of my grandmothers who passed on. Even though they lived long lives (98 & 99) I still miss them. I hold onto that hope. May God bless and comfort you. Congratulations on having your poem featured this week. Dane

  1. Date: 4/13/2009 4:28:00 PM
    What a heartfelt poem. The love comes through your words. Well written piece. Congratulations on having it featured. I wish you ongoing success with your writing. Karen

  1. Date: 4/13/2009 3:05:00 PM
    no, no of course not!

  1. Date: 4/13/2009 10:31:00 AM
    Oh Judith, how could I ever have missed this? I am so sorry. It is an amazing write, that absolutely hurts. Reminders of a loss so deep. I do not believe that hole will ever be filled. I know many who have to live this way, and I will never understand why. I plan on going first and that is all there is to it. Congrats dear friend on your beautiful poetry being featured this week. Love, Shar

  1. Date: 4/13/2009 8:44:00 AM
    This is an Awesome poem-Congradulations on being featuered this week-Rhonda Kay

  1. Date: 4/13/2009 6:45:00 AM
    Congratulations on your poetry being featured this week Judith. May you have many more featured in the future. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 4/13/2009 6:19:00 AM
    Congratulations on being featured this week....Aleera