Hold Back

I don't want to lose you, We vowed this life is ours to share, If these words are really true, We could have a perfect love affair. You said you really want me, Yet you're letting us fall apart, Am I too blind to see, If only I had known from the start. All you do is hold back, Hold back the fever, All you do is make me feel, Like there is nothing real, In you heart. All you do is hold back, Hold back the hunger, You are making me cry, I don't know why, You hold back. Hold back your love ... Hold back

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John Hamilton

Date: 8/21/2016 11:43:00 PM

Great lyrics Jesse, I can picture it easily as a song on the radio, maybe needs to be longer though, maybe add a chorus or bridge, just thinking out loud, minor key is always good look at what Adele does!

Jesse Day
Date: 8/24/2016 1:19:00 PM

Thanks, John -

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 8/4/2016 3:09:00 AM

I can imagine these lyrics in a one beautiful sad song.I love it !!! Charma.

Jesse Day
Date: 8/5/2016 5:33:00 AM

Charmaine, I have set it to music in a minor key with a tone of blues. I think it sounds pretty good! Thanks for reading and for your positive feedback.

Carrie Richards

Date: 8/3/2016 9:42:00 AM

Such lyrics could easily be put to music. Sad and lovely this is ! PS....many thanks for my placement in your recent contest !! I'm so pleased you liked my poem. It is based on an old song my dad would sing on camping trips, in the firelight. Thank you!

Jesse Day
Date: 8/5/2016 5:38:00 AM

Thanks for your positive feedback - your contest poem is brilliantly composed. It was easy to see your vision and here the sounds. Everything was surreal and dreamlike. The loss is really felt as well. I loved it!