Having Lived a Life Without Ever Living a Day
Your lips are moving, mine are too
With stories and tales from all those years ago
But the more you say, the worse I feel
Because I never lived
I never lived
Tales of a romance born when you were too young to know
Of experiments made when your chances were low
Of getting caught underneath the stairs
And now all I can do is stare
At the wall, plain and white and bare
Like my life prior to that dare
That I made when I was young and
Dumb enough to think I knew it all
You've lived it all
And I've never even left my room
But I'll fake it anyway
What good has the real story done anyway?
You ask me for a story of mine
I stutter and trip over a single line
"I had no friends, I raised myself."
Is the truth that I say
The truth that I say
And God, it just tears me up that my peers had such fun
Living it up, making mistakes when they were young
I never lived a day, never took a chance
And only now I take a glance
At the wall, crawling ivy taking it
Seeds of spirit growing to fit
Between the cracks
Weathered on the face by time
Nobody wanted to see me
But I tried so hard to shine
So bright they couldn't ignore me
Luck never shined on me
And still you talk
Talk about things I wish I'd lived
Lived to make my own mistakes
To seize my own day
And still you talk
Talk about things I'd love to see
See with my eyes to know I'm here
And seize my own day
So I could talk
Talk about how I messed up
Up the creek with a homemade paddle
To seize my own day
God, I wish I could talk
Talk about how I lived my days
Days spent making something perfect
But what good did dreams ever do for me anyway?
Copyright © Derek Chos | Year Posted 2014
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