Hangover

I will admit to being confused my face this morning, looks contused I have memory none of what went on where I was or what had on I appear to be wearing womens’ clothes and there’s something strange tickling my nose Down below’s all intact, I checked before with zealous tact The strangest writing’s on my chest, sort of text-speak, rhyming jest And using mirror I read on, appears quick-written by a girl called Ron Rhymes with duck and punt and rum and parting statement says “what fun!” Wallet’s full, I don’t despair but something sticky in my hair? Trying to rise from out my lair, I see I’m handcuffed to the chair But what’s more vexing is the sign on front room window’s polished line The man in here, should get a medal he’s fun and such a sexy devil!