Growing Emptiness

My flesh and bone, can't seem to hone in on the substance I once had Right and wrong, difference known I never can choose anymore good over bad I once was an optimistic hope filled inspiration Now consumed by an empty shallow occupation Fame, sex, drugs, feels good to the touch but never, inevitably, amounts to much Loving pleasure, hating to face pain The suppression just makes me insane Selfishness, recklessness and pride prevail My half hearted attempts at decency always fail Not because normalcy is unattainable But because I choose instead to have my belly full Once I chose depth and sincerity over surface greed When darkness calls I now heed While these things seem to satisfy now I can't help to see my outlook on life is increasingly foul A self inflicted wound, I must admit I know this life is not a good fit Once again I'm reminded that time after time and all the same signs I just can't seem to repress This growing emptiness