Good Friends I Lack

Why does it feel like I'm always stuck between a rock and hard place, With each and every decision that I face, Shooting for the moon only to hit a star, Close friends are few and far, So if you're reading this and thinking it's about you, Then there might be a couple things you need to change too, I don't have a lot of people in my crew, Not wanting to get treated like I'm used too, Thinking about every decision that I've made, Kicking the bad stuff out of my life like I'm spraying glade, Keeping things so fresh and so clean, But still good friends are far and in-between, Just really looking for a shoulder to lean on, Some one to tell me that it's ok to move on, With everyday feeling like I'm goin insane, All these fake friends putting things in my brain, Saying I'll be here if you ever need me someday, But when in need they turn around and walk away, Or act like they didn't see anything I've said, Reading the messages then marking it unread, Acting like I didn't know how this would have went, So I end up erasing it all before it could be sent, Knowing that theirs only a few people who have my back, It's always the good friends that I lack...