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Diana Rosser Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled For you which was written by poet Diana Rosser. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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For you

You are my love, my Garden of Eden,
my safe harbour in life’s hostile tempest.
The place I fold into when all things else
have left me raging and almost beaten.
When desolate clouds have choked all reason
and dark grim despair beguiled comforts rest,
where even natures hand remains unblessed,
there you abide through every season
an anomalous beam in sightless mist. 
Though ripeness has stolen youth’s bright lustre 
you smell as sweet as those first teenage days.
Summer meadows still lie within your kiss
and bound within the curve of you, laughter
still exists amidst dreams and loves warm gaze.

Copyright © Diana Rosser

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  1. Date: 5/4/2012 5:23:00 AM
    A belated congratulations on your win in the "Sonneteers" contest Diana. Love, Carol

    Rosser Avatar Diana Rosser
    Date: 5/4/2012 6:48:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thank you.
  1. Date: 4/27/2012 10:41:00 PM
    Congrats on your placement for this romantic write. I really enjoyed line 5... desolate clouds. Smiles from Cyndi

    Rosser Avatar Diana Rosser
    Date: 5/4/2012 6:48:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thank you, sorry it has taken so long to reply.
  1. Date: 4/5/2012 1:55:00 PM
    Hello new poet friend please DO divide your sonnet into lines 1-8 then a line break and lines 9-14 and you have lost your end rhyme patter in the last 6 lines. line 9 mist (c) line 10 lustre (d) line 11 should rhyme with have days..the end rhymepattern for what you have now is c,d,e,c,d,e...YOU need c,d,c,c,d,c or c,d,c,d,c,d...please correct Light & Love

    Rosser Avatar Diana Rosser
    Date: 4/6/2012 7:29:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thank you for your comment, this is an Italian (Petrarchan)sonnet and as you probably know the "a-b-b-a, a-b-b-a pattern became the standard for Italian sonnets. For the sestet there were two different possibilities c-d-e-c-d-e and c-d-c-c-d-c. In time, other variants on this rhyming scheme were introduced such as c-d-c-d-c-d" Wikipedia and other sources. As you have noted the subset I have chosen is c-d-e-c-d-e. Also many sonnets are not split and some allowance nowadays is made for nearish rhyme. Thank you for commenting I do value the time you have taken to let me know how you feel.
  1. Date: 3/27/2012 11:40:00 PM
    These are beautiful words that exude a steadfast love. Good write- JH