Feast of the Beast: Jan Allison and Lin Lane

The mean old housecat has bulgy eyes when she looks at us in our fish bowl Oh, how much we've come to despise that big mouth of hers, the black hole Poised to pounce with sharpened claws She's taking jabs with hatred brimming that ugly feline beast with drooling jaws for us little fishes, innocently swimming   Our little bowl is cosy, room for only two bad kitty on the outside, always looking in If her paw ever grabs us, what are we to do we’d be much safer in a smelly sardine tin! If she ever catches us, we’ve got big troubles perhaps in her dreams she sees us as fat trout In fear we produced a stream of gassy bubbles If only our owner would give bad kitty a clout!   All the chaos made us soil ourselves with poop so we let that mean old cat feast on a tasty treat When her nasty tongue slurped intestinal goop the beast screeched in horror! Revenge is sweet! Our owner came home and cleaned out the bowl Soon we returned to our safe sweet smelling home Kitty got banned but can see us through the keyhole Now we don’t suffer from irritable bowl syndrome!