Ewmer and Bugs Paint the Town Wed

Got home awound twee (I was dwunk as a wouse) Awose pwomptly at six wit' dwy cotton-mouth I knew wather soon my day was gonna' bwow When I stwuggled outta' bed and stubbed my wight toe Fwopped back on the mattwess cwying and twitchin' Staggoid back up and wimped to the kitchen Stumbled to the counter to bwew Folger's bwend Spiwwed it down my Hanes and boint my widdle fwend Hobbled to the bathwoom to wustle up some Tums Twipped on my fwip-fwop and bwuised my weft bun Should not have cawoused wit' owe Bugsey wast night Now my head hoits and de wight is too bwight If I had not dwunk gin for my mowale booster I coulda' swept in trew 'dat wascally wooster (Don't feel wike wunning dat siwwy wat-wace Tink I might caw in sick at the Woony-Tune pwace)