Get Your Premium Membership

Ethereal

Poet's Notes
(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Silent One.


A quick Sunday scribble for Ethereal contest by Constance.

I wanted to use alliteration and assonance however, I feel some emotions are lost when writing this way.

"At the end of my life, with just one breath left, if you come then, I'll sit up and sing. That cannot now be said or written." Rumi
Lyrics of loneliness liberate in a lucid language, lulling loveless librettos of lamenting loss. In deadly depths of darkness, deep desires dipped in despair, misplace my marooned mind in metaphorical mists of misconception. Deserted in a domain of demons, there's an aura of angst amongst absent angels. When reality resembles a betrayal of butterflies, withered wings wilt in wild winters without a wish. In timeless tender tunes of tearful toxic torment, nocturnal nightingales cry in a crepuscule chorus, confessing caged crescendos in cryptic codes. Sickness slithers in sinister silence, as grinning Grim Reaper reveals his reflection. My sojourner soul seeks a saviour's silhouette. Who soothes in seraphic serenades of serenity. To float in fate's fountain of featherless freedom. In forbidden fields where fluorescent flowers flourish forever. Her effervescent eyes exhale an elixir, evoking an exotic, enticing, everlasting epiphany. Enchanting in echoes of an Edenic enduring enigma. Beneath bluebells, breathless and broken, let me lay inside the lilacs of her amorphous aroma. Her swan song closing chapter of my chronicles. A halcyon harmony of heavenly harps, guiding my gondola towards golden gates of grace.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2023




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

123
Date: 9/30/2023 2:32:00 PM
Dear Silent One, your sparkling alliteration only further enhances your breathtaking imagery. I adore both the Rumi quote and your deeply emotional and poetically rich poem. Your heart and soul and your golden pen shine in this piece. Belated congratulations for well deserved POTD honors. Warmest wishes my friend.. ~Susan
Login to Reply
Date: 9/24/2023 7:06:00 AM
Silent, beautifully penned, congratulations on your win in my contest, I love your poem, the image, the quote well done.
Login to Reply
Date: 9/23/2023 6:48:00 PM
Loved this one immensely a fave and congrats on another potd!
Login to Reply
Date: 9/23/2023 3:38:00 AM
You have a heavenly graceful ethereal style of writing poetry my friend and yet so natural and instinctive and so characteristic of yourself, Silent One. Congratulations on your POTD, honoring this exquisite poem Hugs and blessings, Jennifer.
Login to Reply
Date: 9/22/2023 8:23:00 PM
Back to your wonderful poem with congratulations on this well deserved POTD, dear Silent friend.
Login to Reply
Date: 9/21/2023 12:43:00 PM
Congrats on the POTD. Silent one. Well earned
Login to Reply
Date: 9/21/2023 10:43:00 AM
Belated congratulations on your POTD, SO! Your creative use of alliteration creates a rhythmic flow that is poetic music. What a joy and a treat to read your masterfully written poems! Blessings!
Login to Reply
Date: 9/20/2023 6:11:00 AM
Very expressive and emotive lines penned. I like the Rumi quote used as a starting point of your love poem which is romantic and passionate. Thanks for sharing it with us and for dropping by my page. Sara
Login to Reply
Date: 9/20/2023 5:11:00 AM
Sorry I missed yesterday! Congratulations Silent One! Your alliterative ability amazes! I do not think that any emotion was lost perhaps only enhanced in your powerful lines!
Login to Reply
Date: 9/20/2023 4:13:00 AM
Back with the wish of heartiest congratulations, this poem is definitely a masterpiece and a brilliant POTD choice. Your writes always unlock a vivid poetic spectrum and one can always learn so much from your opulent skills, just wow :)
Login to Reply
Date: 9/20/2023 12:24:00 AM
Oh what a joy x can I choose "My sojourner soul seeks a saviour's silhouette" as my epitaph. Love this. Fabulous POTD. A masterpiece dare I say? Congratulations :))
Login to Reply
Date: 9/19/2023 8:43:00 PM
So good with Metaphors, imagery and feeling of the heart in all your poems. So, again congratulations on POTD my dear friend
Login to Reply
Date: 9/19/2023 8:00:00 PM
A fine alliterative journey full of emotional grace, glory, and sorrow. An entrancing energetic tour de force of heart-rending vitality. "Fates fountain of featherless freedom" would like to be on your gondola floating in that direction. Congratulations so well deserved! Robert
Login to Reply
Date: 9/19/2023 7:05:00 PM
It is simply gorgeous, S.O! My warmest congrats on potd! I love it :)
Login to Reply
Date: 9/19/2023 6:08:00 PM
Revealing emotions through alliterations, can be challenging at times, but you've succeeded; Silent One. Congratulations on Poem of the Day. My best to you. Hugs, Brandy
Login to Reply
Date: 9/19/2023 4:36:00 PM
Hello Silent One, congratulation, Very well , enjoyed poem. Best regards, AA
Login to Reply
Date: 9/19/2023 2:17:00 PM
Gorgeous penning, as always, Silent One:-) So good to read you again. Heartiest congratulations on your POTD kudos!
Login to Reply
Date: 9/19/2023 11:44:00 AM
Wonderful alliteration, S O, and congrats on POTD.
Login to Reply
One Avatar
Silent One
Date: 9/19/2023 12:09:00 PM
Thank you Jim
Date: 9/19/2023 10:57:00 AM
Constant daily course: my sojourner soul seeks a savior’s silhouette…. Alliteration tour de force, S1. Splendid POTD!! :-)
Login to Reply
One Avatar
Silent One
Date: 9/19/2023 12:11:00 PM
Thank you.
Date: 9/19/2023 9:43:00 AM
Congratulations on POTD! I enjoyed it :-) -AG
Login to Reply
One Avatar
Silent One
Date: 9/19/2023 12:12:00 PM
Thanks
Date: 9/19/2023 8:46:00 AM
Back with BIG congratulations on a well-deserved POTD, SO. Thrilled to see you on this platform. Enjoy this honor today.
Login to Reply
One Avatar
Silent One
Date: 9/19/2023 12:12:00 PM
Thank you Sotto
Date: 9/19/2023 7:57:00 AM
Congratulations S.O on POTD…..Debx
Login to Reply
One Avatar
Silent One
Date: 9/19/2023 8:06:00 AM
Thank you..
Date: 9/19/2023 7:51:00 AM
Congratulations for your excellent POTD ! Enjoy :)
Login to Reply
One Avatar
Silent One
Date: 9/19/2023 8:06:00 AM
Thank you..
Date: 9/19/2023 7:20:00 AM
Amazing from start to finish. You are gifted with emotion, heart and soul, grace and bottomless talent dear SO ! I especially loved ~ Sickness slithers in sinister silence and My sojourner soul seeks a savior’s silhouette. Love how you finished guiding in your gondola ! Big congratulations on POTD! Hugs, Susan :)
Login to Reply
One Avatar
Silent One
Date: 9/19/2023 8:07:00 AM
You are too kind in your comments, I tried a bit of alliteration.. too much can make it sound bad... thanks.
Date: 9/19/2023 6:51:00 AM
An exceptional Alliteration, Silent One. Your voice comes clears through in this soothing poem. Congratulations of your POTD honor, my friend! A well-deserved award. Enjoy your special day of recognition. Bill
Login to Reply
One Avatar
Silent One
Date: 9/19/2023 8:08:00 AM
I do love alliterations, its my favourite poetic technique.. Thank you Bill...
123

Book: Reflection on the Important Things