Doubts

I draw pictures on the wall to express my emotions I dream about death so I can feel alive I sing lullabies to calm all of the commotion I cry myself to sleep to feel all right I distance myself to protect my heart And lie through my teeth to get people to leave me alone Yet I still get run over and torn apart Bruised up skin and fractures in my bones The joy I once found playing games from my childhood Don’t make me smile as big as it did The creativity I had when I made my first imaginary friend Is something that I will always miss I’ve grown up now and everything is different I didn’t become the princess I told myself I would be This life came with a heart that was bent And a false hope that I was taught to believe I didn’t become the one I saw myself to be For I draw pictures on a canvas that no one knows about And write poems that are filled with my feelings And forever I will have my doubts