Dog Trap

s/he got a new dog & like many dogs before it, it shed & it jumped up on the sofa, the comfy chair in the living room, etc.--- in regards to the prior dogs in her/his life, s/he had “suffered” the hair deposits, the smell of dog, be it dry or wet, and the rest of the litany of petty problems which dog owners will claim when going to great lengths to tame & beat their happy dog into submission--- one day, s/he came up with an idea as to how to get the dog off the chair & the sofa--- s/he got up early in the morning, wrapped the chair in a sheet & then subsequently wrapped that sheet in electrical tape, masking tape & that really sticky gray duct tape, all with the adhesive side facing up--- after the chair was engulfed in tape, s/he left the house & went to work. low & behold, when the once-frustrated dog owner returned to her/his abode that evening, there was a whimper coming from the living room--- the dog, a shaggy dog whose resemblance to a frayed towel was uncanny, had gotten itself stuck on the tape & the pulling of its hair in the attempt to escape the tape-engulfed chair, was too much for the poor dog, who had been undergoing the pain for who knows how long--- the satisfied owner talked conceitedly to the dog, asking it what the problem was (as if the poor dog had any idea what this horrible human was babbling) & then got down on her/his knees to help the dog from the trap that had worked out just the way the owner suspected that it would, because the dog never set foot on the chair or the sofa again.