Do You

Do you still think about me because God do I still think about you. Not constantly, but in the moments when night becomes dawn . On the bus, windows fogging up as condensation gathers, taking me be back to when I could hear your laugh clear as day. Riding my bike home as I peddle faster until I can no longer remember how truly brown your eyes are. How warm your voice was on the phone as I deep cleaned my kitchen. I mostly remember the bad moments. 1: I told you I didn’t think I could ever love you the way loved me. I was scared. 2: You would tell me you loved me every time we would say goodbye. I would walk away pretending not to hear you. I loved you. 3: I tried so many times, but the last time was for me not for you. I could no longer watch as you desperately clung to my hands as I pulled away. How many times did I break your heart because I can only count three, but it has to be more than that. All I ever did was take an take and take I never learned how to give you my heart , but oh God how I would give it to you now if it meant forgiveness.