Destiny

I have ghosts who live inside me and refuse to move out They tear me apart piece by piece with every passing moment, as I try not to remain silent anymore but my cries are muffled by the shadow choking me, I tremble and shiver as the air inside my lungs slowly disappears and starts to get replaced by non-existent water, the force of a million goodbyes pulls me under the water I try to hold on to a glimmer of hope on the surface but my strength is nothing compared to the regrets that pull me in. My desperate hands try to hold on to the air for the last time, but as obvious as it is I held on to nothing, to an expression that doesn't exist, I might be foolish but maybe I was just lost in the moment, I was a child, I was innocent and naive, I didn't know better, but somehow it's still all on me, it's my fault so I pay the consequences of my own actions and I with tears in my eyes and heart being turned to shreds watch without flinching the life being sucked out of me and I smile as I get crushed and bear the pain of my heart and soul simultaneously being burned to ashes multiple times over and over until I breathe my last still smiling because I know the end to this merciless voyage has arrived and my mind is now free from this constant state of torture and suffering. But when I finally close my eyes I am greeted by the sound of all my burdens and mistakes, the people I've hurt, the ghosts I've provoked, the pages I've torn and the bridges I've burned following me ruthlessly with swords and daggers the peace I dreamed of turns out to be a myth, a lie. I lift my skirt that weighs the weight of my crime and try to run and escape them all but I trip and fall and scream as I land on the shattered glass that pierces through my skin, the flowing blood tying me to the ground as they all catch up to me and pitilessly stab me with their weapons, my clothes my body, my hair all drenched in blood every inch of me reeking with the scent of it. I lay there lifeless finally accepting that this is my forever and nothing I do or don't do would be able to change it.