Cry Out But Nobodys Listening

I can't see right I can't think right I can't hear right I can't live life I can't fully be myself I can't see why. I'm confused I'm a recluse I'm selfish sometimes I'm not right I'm sick and I'm not getting better. I live but I don't live I don't have many friends I don't feel comfortable writing this I am not right in the head. I am spinning and I can't stop. How did I end up here. I try I fail and when I succeed I'm still not happy sometimes. I've tried and tried but I keep coming back here. Sometimes everything seems ok but I'm questioning if it's just a mask to hide all my pain. My life is a ?