Can'T Let Go

I dont know what to do, all i know is that I love you, and at many times I want to forget you. The lies you tell are unforgivable, but the joy you bring me is unbelievable. I wish you would give me your heart,the way I gave you mine, and you did at one point in time. I wish things could be the way they used to be, when I loved you and you loved me. We used to get along so well,but where we stand now, I cant tell. I hate that you make me feel this way,when I see you I forget all that I planned to say. I want to erase you out of my mind and keep you in my heart,but im afraid if i do we will eventualy part. i'm scared to keep you around and even more scared to loose you. I hope and pray that you will change because for you my life I would gladly rearange. All I want to know is how you truly feel, when you tell me my heart will either break or heal.So can you just seal the deal and tell me how you truly feel,just keep it real. I just want you around and 'till then i'll be lost hoping to be found. I'm so lost and so confused and I hate not knowing what to do.You make me so happy and so blue. Do I try to forget you or embrace you for you?