Broken Fist Apology

I've done it again, I've tried resisting the urge but the anger took over and won so did the brick wall that shattered another knuckle How many times have I been through this Only twice, hopefully this is the last time I can't bear for her to see my face steaming I can't bear everyday for myself to see her give me the saddest look that rips me in half I can't bear to see the look in her eyes... I might as well be a shadow under the sun Let this pass but only music can bring me out of this trance like state Cause I refuse to let anything else to try and shape me even though I let a wall shape my hand and a girl shape my heart Shield her eyes, I could try but I wouldn't succeed She's concerned, she's mad; I'm reckless but not careless I didn't want a fight, just something to hit but I didn't want her to see me boasting my pain I didn't want her to see the steam pour from my skin I didn't want her to see the look in my eyes So I avoided hers which I felt watching me I'm physically and mentally tired because I waited up all night to show her my world a great accomplishment I would call it but it was only something minor Too bad she has to be where she is right now cause I need a wave of calm, I'm too tightly wound Sorry Trapt, I needed that analogy since this headache is keeping away all my creativity The only thing left to say I can never let a wall shape my fist again cause that same wall that won against my fists would dig a trench in me and root a wall inbetween me and that earthly star that I have to forcibly leave at 3: 40 pm